Garth has listened to over 3,000 songs already for the new album. His producer Allen
Reynolds has listened to over 3,000 also. Garth’s own personal writing by his own
admission right now is extremely dark. The pressure is on. The pressure to bring material
together that will satisfy not only himself, but the label, the radio stations, the critics and
the fans. A self imposed release deadline of Mother’s Day is quickly approaching.
“Wild Horses” was released a while back. Hopefully its release would give some insight
into how well Garth would be received by radio. Radio, much like the media, and
Nashville’s elite in the industry, have long served as both Garth’s saving grace and biggest
threats. He’s never known given a move in his career if he would be torn to shreds or
praised as the patron saint of the day. Country music is a very fickle business where one
day you are everyone’s darling and the next you are yesterday’s old news.
Garth has felt rejection and betrayal by the very industry that looks to him to save it.
Walking into the ASCAP luncheon at the Country Radio Seminar, Garth appeared low
key. Almost as if he was scared to be there. Almost as if he couldn’t take anymore
rejection from the people who loved to ridicule his every move and decision. His clothing
was that of Garth, not GB. His manner was that of Garth, not GB. His mood was that of
Garth, not GB. This was a man just walking in, getting back to basics and hoping to God
he didn’t get his ass shot off again.
His song selection of choice spoke a lot about where he stands with the new album. He
fell back into his old catalog. He returned to songs that had influenced him over the years
and songwriters who’s music give him comfort. Garth says that right now, where he
would like to be musically reminds him of Bob Seger’s music in the 1970’s. Garth also
was very open and honest in that his relationship with Sandy right now is strongly
influencing his writing. This has created a darkness that he compared his writing to as,
“Edgar Allen Poe on downers.”
As much rejection, betrayal, ridicule and pressure as this industry can dish out, nothing
compares to the self imposed damage Garth can do to himself. Nobody puts pressure on
Garth like he does to himself. Nobody puts limits, restrictions and barriers on Garth like he
does to himself.
For all his I’m tough, “I can take what the critics dish out,” the man is obviously very hurt
and unsure about what his future holds musically. Some call him egotistical. Some go so
far as to call him an egomaniac. I call him a scared little boy in a grown man’s body with
many battle scars and a heart that has been literally stomped to pieces. I don’t buy the big
tough man attitude. That crap quit flying with me a long time ago. Garth is a kind gentle
soul with the fiercenes of a lion and the sweetness of a teddy bear.
Garth walked into that luncheon probably more scared than he has been in a long time.
Scared to death of the way he would be received by the industry that loves to hate him.
Scared to death of their expectations. Scared to death of their reactions. Scared to death
of yet one more rejection in a series of many.
You have to look at where he is at right now. He has finally came to the realization that
his family has to come first and stop being second to the music. He is dealing with
fatherhood head on. He is dealing with the guilt of not being the father he feels he should
have been all along. He is trying to make up for lost time with his children. He has lost his
Mother. His marriage has gone to hell in a handbasket. He was totally shot down by the
industry when he tried to venture in a different direction with the Chris Gaines project. He
released “Wild Horses” to the radio community who had longed complained about him
straying from his country roots; only to have some not play it because it is too country.
He has struggled with the decision to give up the road and touring. He did what was
probably one of the scariest thing he ever had to do when he announced his retirement.
He was crucified and praised for reaching 100 million in sales. He has been called greedy
and power hungry for re-packaging his older material just to make those sales. He’s been
Nashville’s biggest savior and their worst enemy. He knows that by retiring he’s
responsible for not only “ending” a part of his own career but that of many employees he’s
taken care of over the years. He knows that good, bad or ugly, his retiring will also effect
sales of country music. He also knows if its good, he’ll be deemed a hero and if its bad or
ugly he will be branded a traitor.
No wonder the man is literally torn in a million different directions emotionally and
mentally. I’d worry about him if he weren’t!
It’s no wonder that he feels like his writing is so dark, so deep, so heavy and so sad.
Given what he’s dealt with the past few years it would almost have to be there in his
words. Garth is finally at that place where its all coming out into words, all the emotions,
all the hurt, all the anger, all the pain. God give him the strength to keep letting it flow.
At first when I heard him comparing his writing to “Edgar Allen Poe on downers” it really
made me sad. Then it made me mad. Then I felt like throttling him. Then I felt like
hugging him. It’s time like this that I fight the urge to literally whack him upside his hard
head and fight the urge to kiss it and make it better.
But, given the fact that I am no expert at song-writing. And, given the fact that I am no
expert at even writing columns for Planet Garth. And, given the fact that I am literally no
expert at anything, all I can do is call it like I see it. So here I go...calling it like I see it.
Garth...
You have got to slow down. Stop. Forget deadlines. Forget pressure from your label.
Forget pressure from radio. Forget about what the critics say. Forget about what the
backstabbing industry on Music Row thinks. Forget about everything but letting the
music take care of itself. When it is time, when it is God’s time...that music, just like
everything else in your life will fall into place. Nobody is expecting miracles from you
with this (un-last) album. At least us fans are not.
We’d much rather have you happy, whole and complete again, able to give us the music
from your heart. We don’t want an album of pushed, pressured material. An album that
was forced because of deadlines and to silence those who care little about you or your
music to begin with. That would not be an album of the Garth we know and love. That
would not be an album of the Garth that showed us that music is a passion to be taken
care of like a lover.
You spoke “Do you stay for the children or lead them to the light?” Garth, you have to
take time to heal. Slow your life down enough so that you can find that light you’re so
desparately searching for. Only then will you be able to help lead your daughters to its
shining beacon. What you have to come to accept is that you and their mother are that
light for those little girls right now. You have to forgive yourself and realize that you are
worthy of that light. Only then will you be able to allow yourself to find it again and share
it with others.
If I thought threatening you with Super Glue again would do the trick I would. But, for
the most part, you have finally gotten that concept I was trying to get across. So listen
up. You have to take care of you. You have to love you. You have to value yourself to
your fullest potential before you can any do any of that for anyone else. You can’t give to
anyone else when your heart is filled with past regrets and what ifs.
This album if need be, can wait. It can wait till summer. It can wait till Christmas. It can
wait for five years if it needs to wait. We are not going anywhere. I used that Super Glue
to attach you to my heart strings a long time. You are truly just going to have to accept
the fact that your fans are the most dedicated and loyal this world will ever know. In
other words, you are stuck with us.
I don’t know if you remember this or not. One time you told me, “maybe you couldn’t
write because you were too scared about what was gonna come out onto paper?” Well,
Garth...
“Maybe you can’t write because you’re too scared about what’s gonna come out onto
paper.”
You can reasonably accuse me of most anything I’d imagine. However, me not taking
your words to heart isn’t one of them. Take your own words now and apply them to
yourself. Maybe you need to be writing like Edgar Allen Poe on downers. Maybe
somebody out here needs to hear a song like that. You can only confront your demons if
you get them out of your head. You taught me that and it’s a lesson I will never forget.
Garth, no pressure. Take your time. Make things right within your heart and inside your
head. After that is done, then can you begin the process of taking care of the music again.
Learn to put GB on the back burner and to let Garth shine a little on his own. He’s one
hell of a man and he deserves his own place in the sun.
You’ve been shot down, cut down, knocked down. Everytime you’ve managed to get
back up, get out there and swing that sword. It’s truly okay if you just don’t have it in
you to do it this time. Let your heart lead your head to where your soul needs to be.
Then, you’ll find peace in your writing and in your music again. And if it comes out as
one sad song...we’re just going to sit back and wipe a tear with you. We’re going to love
you just the same, respect you that much more and hold you all the closer to our hearts for
allowing us once again to share your life.
Teresa Morris
