The other night as I watched the people’s choice awards I waited with anticipation for the
moment Garth would perform. I thought about the last time he was on the show....his
Mama was there with him and so was his Dad. Now, here he was singing with a
background of purple lights, “When You Come Back To Me Again.”
My heart broke and soared at the same time. It was so good to see him on a stage again
singing that heart music that warms our very souls. He was so hesitant at first. Was it
insecurity at the way he’d be received? Was it a million countless memories flooding his
head? Was it nervousness? Whatever it was, it only took a few seconds for it to pass.
Garth sank his whole heart into that performance and when he looked up his eyes told the
story. It was as if he felt a million arms surround him and a voice strong and beautiful
saying “it’s going to be okay.” You could almost see the moment he relaxed. You
certainly heard it in his voice.
I went and sat down in front of the television in the dark. The girls came out of their
rooms and stood behind me. Jason walked out of the kitchen and in a rare moment of
silence, they let me get lost in the song. The only thing I heard was Lindsey whispering
behind me, “Mama the lights around Garth are purple, does that mean Mama Brooks is
there watching over him?” I found myself smiling, I also found myself with a tear rolling
down my face. It hit me like a brick wall...I miss Garth. I miss the music. I miss the
excitement. I miss the friends and people it all brought to my life.
It’s probably just the mood I’ve been in lately. My life is going through a lot of changes.
I’m finding that I am having to take a long look at where I’ve been and where I’m going.
I am discovering more and more every day how precious time is and how fast it is slipping
by. Slowly, I am learning and discovering just who I am and what is most important in my
life. I’m beginning to realize that my priorities and the way I see life may take me in a
different direction than others who are a part of my life. It’s a painful realization but
again, if I am to stay true to myself, I have to stay true to my values, my family, my
commitments and my responsibilities.
I also know that Garth is walking a path somewhat similar to that. He’s in search of
answers to make his life complete. He’s searching for peace, for happiness, for
acceptance of self and others. He’s searching for validation that what he’s doing and
where he’s been and what he is, is what is supposed to be. Though my circumstances are
nothing like his, it’s a journey in life that each of us make at one time or another. I’m sure
that many of you have taken your own personal journeys into your past and what your
future will hold.
I began to think what he does in times when he seeks out comfort. What does he do when
despite the love of family and friends, he just needs to sink into his own thoughts and
reflect? My answer is music and writing. I find comfort in the music that I don’t and
never have found anywhere else. Not only Garth’s music but any music that speaks to the
heart. Granted, Garth’s music is the first place I tend to turn in times of trouble. But,
sometimes, there’s a song on the radio or a song from my past that will reach out and
touch my heart.
There’s a song on the radio right now that does just that. The first time I heard it, my first
impulse was Garth. It was that missing him that was pulling at my heart. The song is
sung by Diamond Rio and is written by Bobby Tomberlin and Stephen Dale Jones. It’s
called, “One More Day.” Though to most, the first impulse would be that it’s a love song.
To me, it’s a little more broad than that. It could also be about anyone you care about; a
friend, your Grandma, a classmate, your children, your spouse, a parent. The song is
written with very simple but intensely powerful lyrics.
Every time I hear it on the radio I find myself thinking about times traveled to concerts,
trips to the gate, quiet talks, laughter shared and looks exchanged. I think about late
nights with friends and long rides pulling back into the driveway at daylight so I could
wake my girls in the morning. I think about ticket day up-chucky feelings and the anxious
twinges everytime you hit re-dial praying for an operator. I think about chats in #gbfan as
people shared about meeting Garth or concert experiences. I think about wild ideas and
crazy stunts to do what had to be done to see a dream come true. I think about people
from miles apart who became so close because of a common love for a man and his music.
I think about phone calls and jokes about traveling up North. I think about fantasies
shared along with tears of sadness and tears of happiness. I think about learning again to
believe after having lost the will to do so.
That song, “One More Day” makes me smile from somewhere deep inside my heart
because it gives me back such precious memories. It also says what I wish I could say but
can’t. It says what neither I, nor any of us, have any right to ask of Garth. It simply asks
for one more day.
“Last night I had a crazy dream, a wish was granted just for me, it could be anything. I
didn’t ask for money, or a mansion in Malibu, I simply wished for one more day with you.
One more day, one more time. One more sunset maybe I’d be satisfied. But then again, I
know what it would do, leave me wishing still, for one more day with you. First thing I
would do, is pray for time to crawl. Then I’d unplug the telephone and keep the TV off.
I’d hold you every second, say a million “I love you’s”. That’s what I’d do with one more
day with you. One more day. One more time. One more sunset, maybe I’d be satisfied.
But then again, I know what it would do. Leave me wishing still, for one more day with
you. Leave me wishing still for one more day with you.” ***
As much as we all know that Garth is where he wants to be and as happy as we are for
that, it doesn’t stop any of us from missing him. The music is something that we will
always have. It will always carry us on our own personal journeys into our memories.
But, it doesn’t keep us from wishing sometimes for just...one more day.
Garth was a huge part of our lives for a long time. He came into our hearts through the
music and left a footprint there. He opened up hearts with the music that had forgotten
how to care, to love, to give and to share. He allowed us to look into his heart and soul
through the music. It’s perfectly understandable that I, that we, miss that terribly. You
can’t help but miss something that was, is, such a part of your heart.
What can we do to fill that emptiness? Be happy for Garth that he is doing what he wants
to do, needs to do. Be happy for many years of concerts and appearances. Be happy for
CD’s full of great music that leaves us smiling and speaks to our hearts. And, if you want
to, find yourself a quiet moment, and go ahead and make a wish for...
“One more day...one more time...”
But be true to yourself. You’d still not be satisfied. This is something that we will never
get enough of. When you find your heart, you can’t help but want for more. So make
that wish but make it with a smile and not a heavy regret. Make that wish in honor of the
amazingly wonderful times that have already passed. Because those precious memories
are what leave your heart wanting more. Make that wish and wipe that tear away and
realize that “one more day” is already in your reach, all you have to do is look inside your
heart.
Teresa Morris
*** “One More Day” written by Bobby Tomberlin and Stephen Dale Jones, sung by
Diamond Rio.
Teresa Morris
